I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. We started dating my second semester of freshman year which at the time he was a sophomore and people always seem surprised to hear that I have been with the same guy for 3 years. It wasn’t easy at all. We had our ups and downs, I had my fair share of sleepless nights in which I questioned everything, there was crying, arguing, but there was also tons of laughter, happiness and good memories that were made. Here’s how we did it…
1) BE YOURSELF! This is so important that you don’t realize how important it really is. Please for the love of god be yourself and let your partner get to know the real you. This will make your relationship so much easier.
2) Be upfront with your partner, if you don’t like something tell them. If you’re only a month into your relationship I wouldn’t be to upfront because you’re still getting to know the person. But other than that if you have something to say then say it.
3) Talk! Talk a lot! If your relationship is in its early stages, then make sure to communicate constantly. I remember my boyfriend and I texted each other everyday. Not every minute of everyday, but we did make conversation everyday, still do. If you don’t communicate then the relationship might not last much longer. Trust me on that one, I know from experience. Seriously COMMUNICATE! Talk about everything,and anything. Talk about each others day,but seem interested. Let each other know what you’re up to. (Not all the time 24/7,but point is just talk a lot.)
4) Spend a lot of time with each other. Now I’m not saying put your friends aside because that is completely unacceptable,but do make time for partner. You need to make sure your boyfriend or girlfriend feels like a top priority,which they should be anyway. Go to football games together or if you’re partying with friends invite your partner to tag along. Point is to make sure that the two of you are spending time together because if you’re not then it will hurt your relationship. If someone is not feeling like a priority, then eventually they will feel like they have dealt with enough “waiting to be noticed”, and may walk away.
5) Give each other space. Don’t be that clingy person in the relationship because nobody likes that person. If you can’t be independent then you can kiss your relationship goodbye. People don’t want to feel like they are taking care of someone, and they definitely do not want someone else to depend on them for everything because then it stresses the other person out, and will only cause problems. You have to trust your partner and let them do them. If you are making up scenarios in your head about your bf/gf cheating or anything that shines a negative light on them PUT YOUR PHONE AWAY! or call a friend and talk on the phone with them,or go out,but DO NOT SEEM LIKE YOU ARE DOUBTING YOUR PARTNER. This can get ugly. Unless you know for a fact that your concerns are real, do not confront them; instead ask them how their night went, who they hung out with, what did they do. Simple questions will do.
6) You will argue,and THAT IS OKAY! What you want to do in these situations is be an adult. I know this can be really hard for some,especially if you are stubborn like me, but if you care about the other person and want your relationship to work,then you HAVE to be the bigger person. This means not yelling, apologizing first if you have to,and actually listen to what your partner has to say. Seriously listen. You want to talk the situation out not just yell at each other and get nowhere. Also talk over the phone,don’t text because that can get really messy and more problems pop up.
7) Tell each other things even if they seem stupid. Talk about everything even your feelings. Really talk about your feelings, that is SO IMPORTANT! This will only allow your relationship to grow and mature.
8) Be each others cheerleader. Get exited for them when they accomplish something, go to their games if they play a sport. Just be there for the other person. If they need someone for comfort make sure that person is you. Make them feel worthy and loved. Put a smile on their face or just hold them tight when their having a bad day.
9) Remind them that you love them. If not you’ll lose them. Simple as that.
10) Get to know each others family. There’s something about this that makes the relationship feel more mature. If your family likes your partner and vice versa then your relationship will be a happy one.
11) Respect each other. This one should just be common sense. We were raised to respect everyone and treat everyone the way we wish to be treated if not then why are you with this person?
12) Be supportive. Support their dreams, their goals, whatever they chose to do in life, support them and help them along the way.
12) Make sure to be there for each other….ALWAYS!